100% Responsibility, Leadership, State of Mind

If you Don’t Create who you Want to Be, you Re-Create who you Already Are

I finally reached the end of a challenging month. I spent 4 weeks oscillating between sickness and conflict. Surprisingly I felt like a king at the beginning of the month. 

Ain’t it funny how 4 weeks can change things. 

The struggles helped me to realise something very important that I wanted to share with you today. 

Who I am is not determined by chance.

Who I am is determined by an act of creation.

Let me clarify that I am not talking about the act of creation that forced me out the womb and into the world. I am talking about an even more important ‘birthday’. The moments after we wake up each day. 

Since the beginning of the year, I’ve been starting my days and ending my nights with a series of important questions. These are declarations of who I AM and a detailed vision of my future self. I call this my daily act of creation.

One of the questions I ask is: ‘who am I?’ 

If you care about the quality of your life, you wont leave this question to chance. 

You see, for the last month I stopped asking this question so often. I stopped reading my vision and declarations too. 

I felt sorry for myself for feeling sick, I woke up later and later, with less and less time available in the mornings.

The less time I spent on my daily act of creation, the faster I slipped into reaction. 

(Funny how those two words have the same letters, don’t you think?)

R.E.A.C.T.I.O.N – C.R.E.A.T.I.O.N

Soon, I was like a ship without a captain. I ended up against the rocks. It happened so slowly that I hardly noticed. It wasn’t until the waves of chaos frothed around my head that I realized what’s going on. 

Stress, arguments, tension and frustration dominated my mind. Then the self-judgement conflicts crept in too.

This impacted my motivation and my desire to create content and show up online. The inner conflict slowed down my mind. It left me feeling disconnected from myself. It left me feeling disconnected from my mission, and my relationship too.

Have you ever felt this?

After a particularly difficult day I thankfully chose to spend a half day alone in silence to reflect. What have I changed? Then I remembered my daily act of creation was missing. Could that be the reason? It turns out that it was. 

What I’ve learned from all of this is that who you are today is the result of who you chose to be today and the night before.

I would go as far as to say that creating yourself daily is the most important thing you will ever do. Why? Because what happens when we don’t do this is that we become our old habituated self. The one we created in high school. Trust me, that isn’t the self you want running your life. 

What that self needs is a loving parent to take care of him or her so that they feel safe. Instead of acting out!

When we wake up each day we have a choice either to allow ourselves to recognise that this insecure part of ourselves is a confused and frightened child. Our job is to be the parent of that younger self, not be that younger self. 

You’ll quickly notice the difference if you neglect that choice. The self that you act from triggers the thoughts that you think and take seriously. This tiggers behaviour and actions which trigger results directly correlated to that first choice. Who am I? Parent or Child?

Who do you choose to be today? Do you know the answer?

Here are 3 ways to help you get started 

  1. Start with who you don’t want to be, and begin to reverse each role or behaviour trait that isn’t working. 
  2. If you are clear on what your vision of what you want to have or do, consider who you will need to be to make that possible?
  3. Ask yourself honestly: If i knew that i could be there for myself today as the parent I never had, who would I need to be? 

Each of these are powerful ways to connect to that person or self. 

Record your answers in a journal and write them out as statements of truth. 

Here are a few of mine 

  • I AM calm deliberate action/asking
  • I AM loving kindness
  • I AM megalithic strength and stability
  • I AM that fully feeling anger and anxiety without blame or judgement leads to peace 
  • I AM that money is an effect not a cause 
  • I AM that I lead with laughter and lightness
  • I AM free, and nothing creates my experience except me in each moment 
  • I AM loved, lovable, and loving always 
  • I AM that I AM the farther and leader i’ve been longing to save me 
  • I AM that I AM a being of priceless value

Test this out for yourself. 

Answer the three questions above and create your own declarations. 

Notice how you feel when you take over the role of deciding who you are instead of hoping you can live upto your own expectations 

If you enjoyed this article please share and like and leave a comment below. I read and reply to everyone.

Lastly, If you are struggling or want to know more about the process above feel free to reach out 

Much love,

Ryan 

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