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Leadership, Mastery, State of Mind

🌨Just the other day I was heading out to meet some friends for a game of pool. As we left our house it looked like it was raining. Then I felt ice on my face and realised it was snow. It confused me a little, and I didn’t know how to react. 🤷🏻‍♂️

❅ I love the snow, but this was not the kind of snow I loved. 

🤩It had completely captured my attention until suddenly the bus arrived and I realised I didn’t have a ticket to board! (You need to buy a ticket first in Stockholm.) I quickly bought one and sat down, laughing at myself for being so consumed in the weather.🙃 

🌨 This made me think about how often I used to find myself caught up in internal Thought Storms like this during the day. It was never an exciting thing like a Snow Storm tho, mostly it was just my worries and fears about what wasn’t working out. 😰

❅ This would always happen when I didn’t have a clear way of organising my time and energy. Outside circumstances would kick off the snow globe in my head. 🌨😨

💡A new idea would pop up mid-way through a task, then I would think to myself “maybe I should change my plans?” “Maybe this is a better idea?” 

☠️This was the death of productivity, creativity and freedom ⛓

As Stephen Covey said

“Only the disciplined are truly free. The undisciplined are slaves to moods, appetites and passions.” 

🌨The moment indecision crept in like this, the thought storm began, and it drove me nuts! Because at some point the “bus” would turn up! I would have to be somewhere or do something that we agreed to and I wasn’t ready. 🤦‍♂️

😡Then I would get angry with myself for letting myself down, Then begin to Judge myself endlessly. 👨🏻‍⚖️

Has anyone else had a similar experience? 

 🕵🏻‍♂️ One solution I discovered to stop this is a gentle decision to examine how to use my time, and where I place my focus throughout the day. Vs where we think I should be or would like to be. ✅

I do this by completing a time audit to discover the objective truth about what is getting in my way and what is causing my distractions. And also to discover what activities are in alignment with what “I say” I want to accomplish. ✅

“The truth needs no defence” Ryan Branch

💰It can be a little challenging to do this, like going through a bank statement to better understand where our money is being spent. But when we do it, we can cut back on the little silly ways we waste our money and save up for something more exciting instead. 🎁

It’s the same for our time, energy and attention. Once you slow down and examine how you spend all of your time throughout the day, you also learn how you spend your energy and attention. Three of our greatest commodities. 💰

🏆 Two major wins occur: Firstly, we get more done. Secondly, we stop feeling shitty about getting distracted. (Not to mention all the judgement and guilt that goes along with it.) 

Just For Today…

How could you bring some focus on how you spend your time? 

And what could you learn about yourself in the process?

Sending love,💙



Leadership, Mastery, Relationships, State of Mind

🥣I was sitting with a bowl of Keto friendly vanilla ice cream the other night, marvelling at how this creation had no sugar in it and still tasted so yummy! 😋

Keto is my new thing at the moment, I have the positive peer pressure of my high performing friends Mark, Perry and Elom to thank for that! 💪

I digress, as I was eating this deliciousness 🍦I was thinking of all the ways you could complement this ice cream with different toppings and ingredients, flavours of every sort. 

🍨That’s the beauty of Vanilla Ice cream vs Chocolate or Strawberry, you can do anything with it and it will always work because of its vanilla!

This got me thinking about being classed as a vanilla kind of person. 👨‍💼Being someone who didn’t have a strong personality! A person who was easy to be around and can to blend into almost anything and improve that thing.

🧒🏻When I was growing up and looking for a male role model all I saw were men with big personalities fighting for attention, to me, this seemed to be what a real man was. 🥊

©So, I copied this, developing a strong personality that some would find overbearing and demanding. 

👺This personality developed further in high school with all the accompanying shame and fear that gets accumulated during our formative years. 

What I was left with was a flavour of personality that was becoming difficult to blend. 

Over the years I tried to improve my life and found success here and there, but what I didn’t realise until much later was that a stronger personality meant limitation. ⛓

Very little capacity for reinvention (the kind that transforms a bowl of vanilla ice cream into a hot fudge sundae or a banana split).

Have you ever experienced this, when you meet someone who is “set in their ways” no room for improvement or reinvention, just more of the same? 

Eventually, I realised that my ability to lead myself and others was not possible unless I began to strip away the personality I thought I was, to access my Core identity so to speak.

🏃🏼‍♂️Moving away from repetitive thoughts and behaviours that I had attached to WHO I AM. Such as people-pleasing, self-sabotage, and angry outbursts.

What I have found is that the more “vanilla” I become, the easier it is for me to become something else for a while without needing to stay that way permanently.🎭

Being vanilla means freedom from a pre-set outcome. A predetermined life. A permanent personality.

📚When you’re vanilla you become the Author of your own identity in each moment. Amazingly how the word Author and Authentic have the same etymological root) 

Could it be that real Authenticity is reinventing yourself from vanilla each time, each day, each moment? Like being a screenwriter and an actor at the same time! 

Can you imagine what that could do for you?  

To become an actor willing to take on any role, to BE or not to BE anyone you wish! without attachment?

So if you got this far, what are some of the limitations that your current flavour imposes on you? 

AND< Just for today, how could you be 5% more vanilla? 

With love,